TNG S0301, S03E02, S03E03, S03E04

In this installment:
(viewed 6/8/2013)

Star Trek:  The Next Generation, S03E01 - "Evolution"
Star Trek:  The Next Generation, S03E02 - "The Ensigns of Command"
Star Trek:  The Next Generation, S03E03 - "The Survivors"
Star Trek:  The Next Generation, S03E04 - "Who Watches The Watchers"

---

"Evolution"

• WAKE UP, WESLEY!  WE'RE STARTING THE THIRD SEASON!
• I never thought I'd be so glad to see a Nehru collar (i.e. hooray for the new uniforms!)
  
  
  
  (courtesy of Star Trek: The Magazine, by way of Ex Astris Scientia)
  
  
  This was the first style of Starfleet uniform that I ever owned, back when I used to do such things.  I had a science/medical tunic in this style when I was an adolescent.  I believe I purchased and then wore it to one of the Starbase Indy conventions in the early 1990s, with Lt. Commander pips if I recall correctly.  Sorry, there are no pictures.
• Hey kids, it's Dr. Bob Kelso!
• Also:  I'm sure you'll all be very surprised to hear that I'm thrilled to see Dr. Crusher back in sickbay.  So long, Dr. Pulaski!
• "So far, we're showing nothing unusual in the computer log for that time period."
  
  Ah, it sounds like like every phone call I ever have at work!
• Beverly Crusher:  The only mother ever to complain about her high-achieving, emotionally mature, morally strong 17-year-old son.
• I guess they need to reformat Enterprise again.
• "There has not been a systems-wide technological failure on a starship in 79 years."
  
  That's...some pretty impressive uptime.
• "I'm scared, Guinan.  I think that everything that's going on might be my fault."
  
  Legions of Star Trek fans agree with you, Ensign Crusher.  I mean, not me.  But definitely legions.
• Oh, for pity's sake.  Who gave Wesley access to the nanites?  THE NANITES?!?
• "Wes, do you think you're going to get a good grade?"
  
  "I always get an 'A'."
  
  "So did Dr. Frankenstein."
• "I think I've made a horrible mistake."
  
  And hey, everybody welcome Ensign Gob!
• This is the first, and I think perhaps the only (although I may be mistaken), time that we actually see the interior of Enterprise's impressive computer core.
• Wait, did Commander Riker just say that it was toxic levels of nitrous oxide?  Well, at least it's a hilarious way to die.
• Worf has a point.  Letting the killer nanites have control of your android probably isn't a great idea.
• You apologize!  You apologize to those nanites!

---

"The Ensigns of Command"

• The opening of this episode shows Chief O'Brien in the background, tuning up what looks like a cello as part of Commander Data's string quartet.
  
  This is ridiculous of course, as we all know that O'Brien doesn't play the cello.  He plays the whiskey bottle.
• "Number One, any speculation on what we might find down there?"
  
  "My guess would be a lone survey craft.  Maybe a dozen or so survivors."
  
  Or, you know...15,000.
• "Only you would get this excited over a walking calculator."
  
  Ah, the 1980s.  When a "calculator" was still a separate thing that people had and wasn't an app on their phone :P
• Honestly, if you've got a seemingly-impossible technological task to accomplish, you can't get a better team than Geordi La Forge and Miles O'Brien.  The only way they could do better is if they'd stumbled upon the USS Jenolan earlier and had good ol' Montgomery Scott to act as team captain.
• Also:  I just bummed myself out by reminding myself that "Relics" isn't until the sixth season :(
• "Even if we get the Sheliak to talk, they're not likely to be accommodating."
  
  "Captain, when the treaty was first negotiated, the Federation sent 372 legal experts.  What do we have?"
  
  "Thee and me?"
  
  And an android who can process and analyze enormous amounts of legal documentation in seconds?  Why do they always forget about the android?
• The Sheliak kind of look like someone hit a Tholian with a fire extinguisher.
• "I don't have any silly prejudice against computers.  I like them!  Not that any computer we have is half as sophisticated as you are."
  
  "No, I would say not."
  
  Even Data permits himself a moment of pride every now and again (even if he doesn't technically possess the capacity to process the emotions associated with "pride").
• This Gosheven guy is like...really attached to his aqueduct.
• "Use that fancy positronic brain of yours and carry out your mission."
  Commander Jerkface.
• First Lt. Yar, now the star-struck ("android-struck?") colonist.  The ladies love Lt. Commander Data!
• "Now, are we progressing Mr. La Forge?"
  
  {a mangled sample container materializes on the transporter pad}
  
  "About like you'd expect, Sir."
  
  "Splendid, spendid.  Carry on!"
• Counselor Troi presents:  Intergalactic Language 101.
• The Sheliak colony ship was a kitbash of the Merchantman model with some additional components.  Included in these additional components--no joke--are the hull sections from submarine model kits.
  
  
  
• Apparently one phaser blast can nuke an entire aqueduct?
• Speaking of which, I forget that the third season of TNG brings us not only the improved uniforms, but also the slightly less ridiculous-looking Type 2 phaser.
  
  
  

---

"The Survivors"

• Until this episode forged its own narrative path, I think every Trekkie assumed the destruction of Delta Rana IV was the result of a Borg attack.
• I mean, it makes sense.  Commander Riker is about as smart as a tetherball.
  
  
  
• "Sir, may I say you're attempt to hold the away team at bay with a non-functioning weapon was an act of unmitigated gall."
  
  "Didn't fool you, huh?"
  
  "I admire gall."
• For people like me--males of a generally heterosexual persuasion who watched TNG during their pre-pubescent and pubescent years, the third season of the show is also notable for the introduction of Counselor Troi's teal dress.  I'm relatively certain that this was the context in which my brain first noticed cleavage.
  
  
  
• I would've liked for the Husnock (extinct at the time of this episode) to be featured in another episode.
• {Worf makes an awful face while drinking tea.}
  
  "What do you think, Mr. Worf?"
  
  "Good tea...nice house."
  
  Again, I'm pretty sure they accidentally gave Worf all of the funny lines.
• I like how Captain Picard figures out what's going on with Kevin Uxbridge way before everyone else, and just opts not to explain himself to anyone.
• Like the Husnock, it would've been neat to see the Douwd show up again in Trek.
• "No, no, no.  You don't understand the scope of my crime.  I didn't kill just one Husnock, or a hundred, or a thousand.  I killed them all--all Husnock, everywhere."
  
  AND NOT JUST THE MEN.  BUT THE WOMEN...AND THE CHILDREN TOO!

---

"Who Watches The Watchers"

• A holographically-hidden observation post up on a hillside to monitor a pre-warp civilization?  Why does that sound so familiar?
• Hey kids, it's Ray Wise!  I prefer to remember him as Satan in the tragically-canceled comedy series Reaper.
• Satan's Liko's daughter, Oji, is played by none other than Pamela Adlon (credited in this episode as "Pamela Segall").  She's a crazily talented actress and producer who's very familiar to me from her involvement in shows like HBO's Lucky Louie, Showtime's Californication, and FX's Louie (oh, and she voiced Bobby Hill on Fox's King of the Hill).
• Do you think Riker really wanted to beam down to look for the missing researcher, or do you just think he was hoping for a chance to bed a new alien race?
• "I believe I have seen the Overseer.  He is called...The Picard."
• So, we go through the trouble of fabricating authentic native clothing and having temporary cosmetic surgery to alter their appearances...and we don't bother to come up with alien names for our away team?
• Counselor Troi has just executed a very cunning tactic taught at Starfleet Academy, known as "HEY LOOK OVER THERE!"
• And Dr. Barron is asking Captain Picard to pull a C-3PO.
• Picard shows a woman from a pre-warp civilization around the Enterprise.  Why does that sound so familiar?
• This is at least the third time that we've seen TNG reference the concept sometimes called Clarke's Third Law:  "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."
• This isn't the last time Troi will have to don the ol' ears and eyebrows.  She will be disguised as a major in the Romulan Tal Shiar in the sixth-season episode "Face of the Enemy".
• "Are you sure you know what he wants?  That's the problem with believing in a supernatural being."
  
  Troi is referencing the sticky metaphysical concept of divine revelation.
• Captain Picard offering his life to dispel Liko's belief that he is a god?  Pretty ballsy.